quotes to live by funny
Nowadays most men lead lives of noisy desperation. ~James Thurber, Further Fables for Our Time, 1956
Most cats, when they are Out want to be In, and vice versa, and often simultaneously. ~Louis J. Camuti
If we resist our passions, it is more because of their weakness than because of our strength. ~Francois, duc de La Rochefoucauld
October's poplars are flaming torches lighting the way to winter. ~Nova Bair
Be neither a conformist or a rebel, for they are really the same thing. Find your own path, and stay on it. ~Paul Vixie
We can never be sure that the opinion we are endeavoring to stifle is a false opinion; and if we were sure, stifling it would be an evil still. ~John Stuart Mill, On Liberty, 1859
For age is opportunity no less than youth itself, though in another dress, and as the evening twilight fades away, the sky is filled with stars, invisible by day. ~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
As a gardener, I'm among those who believe that much of the evidence of God's existence has been planted. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
Save the earth. It's the only planet with chocolate. ~Author Unknown
There are two kinds of light - the glow that illuminates, and the glare that obscures. ~James Thurber
The neurotic has perfect vision in one eye, but he cannot remember which. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960
May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. ~Edward Abbey
Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure. ~Ambrose Bierce
Buying something on sale is a very special feeling. In fact, the less I pay for something, the more it is worth to me. I have a dress that I paid so little for that I am afraid to wear it. I could spill something on it, and then how would I replace it for that amount of money? ~Rita Rudner
Can anything be stupider than that a man has the right to kill me because he lives on the other side of a river and his ruler has a quarrel with mine, though I have not quarrelled with him? ~Blaise Pascal, quoted by Tolstoy in Bethink Yourselves
Order without liberty and liberty without order are equally destructive. ~Theodore Roosevelt
Angels are never too distant to hear you. ~Author Unknown
It's no coincidence that female interest in the sport of baseball has increased greatly since the ballplayers swapped those wonderful old-time baggy flannel uniforms for leotards. ~Mike Royko
You can fool all the people all the time if the advertising is right and the budget is big enough. ~Joseph E. Levine You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time. ~Abraham Lincoln
If I were Opportunity, I wouldn't just knock, you'd have to sign. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
